Do Your Social Network Friends Really Matter?

According to an article on FoxNews.com, a lady died from apparent suicide sometime after posting her actions – Christmas Day – on her Facebook status.

The article declares: Simone Back, 42, had 1,048 Facebook “friends,” none of whom came to her rescue or alerted authorities of her suicidal post that read, "Took all my pills be dead soon bye bye everyone."

It also states: [she] received responses calling her a “liar,” “she OD’s all the time and she lies” and saying the fatal overdose was “her choice,” The Telegraph reports.

And adds: Some out-of-town friends did respond wanting to help, requesting her address and telephone number to no avail. Not one of Back’s friends checked in on her.

This is a very sad story. Any suicide or death of an individual should never be seen as a light thing, because that individual has crossed over into eternity. At this point, their relationship in Jesus Christ matters the most, even though they have surely likewise left weary hearts inside family and friends.

But, this brings up questions regarding Facebook, along with other social networks, and how we allow them to take part in our daily lives. How much is too much? Are we spending more of our lives gossiping over the internet with cyber friends, in place of actually spending time with persons face-to-face?

Take for instance, the “friends” list on Facebook. I personally have 300+ “friends” made up of family, friends I grew up with, church members, coworkers, persons I know and have known, along with others I have merely met online through numerous blogs, forums, etc. Within this list, I most likely only converse with a small number of them regularly in person or on Facebook, and do not even attempt to read the 300+ statuses, updates, etc. which happen daily – or even hourly. I just don’t have that much time, or the desire to do so. Sorry Facebook friends!

With that said, along with the numerous TMI and OMG (ha!) postings on just my Facebook Wall, I can somewhat understand how a status could go unnoticed (even a plea for help) by on-line “friends” (regardless how many) or even Facebook personnel. It is also practical to realize that many times we easily dismiss things, because the person is “known” to “cry wolf” or crave attention. This may not totally remove responsibility from us to seek help for those who may need it, but at the same time it does not place the blame on us and remove all the responsibility from the individual doing so either.

I mean, if we can dismiss the soul hurting we may see each day at work, in our homes, at church, or driving along our way, what makes us think we will pay more attention to our cyber relationships? How easy is it to click “Like” or write a quick comment “Praying for you” – but do we really mean it? Are social networks even used as a means to help one another emotionally and spiritually, to truly build better friendships and communication with those we care about? Or, do they merely make us focus more attention on ourselves, and the curiosity of knowing everybody else’s business – with a stand-off type of responsibility, leaving us with no commitment to intervene with hurting hearts and the needs of others?

Is it better to have 1,048 social network friends, or 1 who really cares? And, if we claim to be someone’s friend, what are we doing to make the relationship so? Are we simple appeasing our conscience, yet searing it at the same time?

Proverbs 17:17a, A friend loveth at all times…

Proverbs 18:24, A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.

One More Sunset by Evelyn Huckaby

A friend of mine has just published her first book!

One More Sunset

"One More Sunset" recounts the poignant and often humorous childhood and life of author Evelyn Huckaby. With true southern flavor, Ms. Huckaby paints a colorful portrait of life in and around New Orleans and Baton Rouge.

Here is a free preview.

ISBN: 978-0-615-25841-6

Pray for the Family of David Glynn Case

A friend of mine from our Sunday school class at church passed away this past Sunday morning. Here is his obituary:

David Glynn Case
Our family chain is broken and nothing seems the same, but as God calls us one by one the chain will link again. David entered this world on Aug. 25, 1965, and departed to be with his Savior, Our Lord Jesus Christ, on Sunday, Aug. 24, 2008, at age 42. Visitation at Seale Funeral Home, Denham Springs, on Wednesday, Aug. 27, from 5 p.m. to 9 p.m. Visitation resumes in the funeral home chapel on Thursday from 9 a.m. until service at 10 a.m., conducted by the Rev. Gerald Martin. Burial in Evergreen Memorial Park, Denham Springs. David attended Fellowship Baptist Church and was a member of the Harmony Sunday school class. He was the collections manager with E-Federal Credit Union. David was an avid sports fan and loved playing golf. He always rooted for his teams, the Dallas Cowboys and the Oklahoma Sooners. David's loving and giving spirit continues to live on through his desire to help others by being an organ donor. David is survived by his wife, Nancy Matthias Case, who he lovingly called "Sunshine"; his two precious sons, Dillon and Brice; their mother, Shannon Voss; his parents, James and Linda Case; maternal grandfather, M.E. "Bud" Smith; an uncle and aunt, Mike and Judy Case; and two cousins, Chad and Alan Case. David was preceded in death by his brother, Paul Earl Case; paternal grandparents, Morris and Doris Case, who were of Brookhaven, Miss.; and maternal grandmother, Dorothy Smith. Pallbearers will be Chad Case, Alan Case, Randy LeBouef, Thomas Miller, Mike Smith and Jeff Lea. Memorial donations may be made to Louisiana Organ Procurement Agency, 4441 N. I-10 Service Road West, Metairie, LA 70006.

David professed Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior, and we know all who put their faith in Christ go to be with Him forevermore when their time on earth is done. But as he embraces eternal life, I can’t help but think of the family who must continue steadfast in their daily walk with God and responsibilities of this life. Their life is not over and I am sure they are and will be faced with many questions and choices, where decisions will still need to be made, maybe even requiring them to do so, while things most likely seem at their worst.

I can’t imagine bearing the loss of my two children, expecting as a parent to pass away long before they should ever enter eternity. How does one grieve the loss of a son or daughter, and stay faithful to God and able to carry on, I scarily wish to consider.

Even now I must admit the loss of my father or mother would be a sadness that would cause my heart to hurt, but how much more so for two young boys who find comfort in the protection their father offered them at such young ages. Sure Nancy will love and comfort them, but children need that special way each parent shares their love differently with each child.

And what of Nancy, the loving wife who just days ago had one who she could confide in, rely on, love, hold and be held, finding security and companionship in David, but may now feel alone though in the very company of family and friends?

By the grace of God may we each be able to endure that which touches our lives, and be ready always to comfort those who carry such weights now. We have a security in Scripture that Christ is willing and able to save all who call upon His name, by putting faith in Him we may hope in the promise of eternal life whereby we may once again see our loved ones who have gone on before us in the name of the Lord.

Friend or Acquaintance

Scripture declares in Proverbs 17:17, “A friend loveth at all times.”

Now, love properly defined does not mean everything we find our friend doing or saying is acceptable and we totally agree with. Sometimes our friendships need to be seasoned with “reprove, rebuke, [and] exhort[ing] with all long suffering and doctrine.”

Honestly, how shallow are most of our so-called friendships, to be honest, whether they be with Christian or non-Christian persons? Do we honestly love them, or do we simply enjoy the prestige or the things that may come from knowing them? Or do we happen to merely hang around them so that we may feel that we are “in the click?”

How often do we use the word “friend” and how often do we honestly mean it?

Are we quick to forget, gossip about, or turn our backs on certain persons that we claim are our friends, as soon as we find another more interesting one? What about if they embarrass us for one reason or another, or hurt us (even by mistake), or others come forth to pull us from them?

Proverbs 18:24 declares, “A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother.”

Do we show ourselves to be “friendly?” Do we stick “closer than a brother” to those we ourselves claim are our friends? If not, then why do we even use such terminology, merely deceiving ourselves and the persons we declare it to? Why not simply denote that all are merely acquaintances that may come and go with the wind, but shall not remain as faithful friends that we shall “loveth at all times?”

Can we share our deepest sorrows and greatest joys? Can we trust that our words, our fears, or concerns are honestly considered and kept secret from the world around us? Is there a faithfulness to one another that goes without saying? Do others find a haven of rest in knowing we care for their physical, emotional, and spiritual well being and desire only the best for them?

What of the times we see them falter or fall from what we believe is right? What of the days that go by where we feel awkward to confront them with such thoughts of encouragement and constructive criticism with only charity in our thoughts? Do we find such in those we cherish as so-called friends? Do any remain at our darkest hour?

Do you truly have any friends or merely acquaintances?
Are you truly a friend or merely an acquaintance?

Do you have a true friend, one who has stuck by you, through many things in your life? Have you told them how much it matters to you? Maybe you should.

Beloved Friend

From among the darkness, amidst the storm
Comes forth a light, with a steady arm
Held out toward me, reaching forth
Bidding me come, to find support
Afraid to trust, but grasp it still
Allowing myself, to acknowledge it’s real
An honest smile, with words of truth
A gentle spirit, to encourage and soothe
A faithful friend, where charity dwells
Able to believe, my heart made well
Truly amazing, to find such a one
A caring soul, when life seems undone
Words of wisdom, acts of grace
Deeds of kindness, freely displayed
Sharing love, and giving hope
A joy from within, they promote
Selfless thought, my spirit mends
Forever dear, my Beloved Friend

Timothy Waldrop
4/3/2008