C.H. Spurgeon

Sinners, let me address you with words of life; Jesus wants nothing from you, nothing whatsoever, nothing done, nothing felt; he gives both work and feeling. Ragged, penniless, just as you are, lost, forsaken, desolate, with no good feelings, and no good hopes, still Jesus comes to you, and in these words of pity he addresses you, "Him that cometh unto me I will in no wise cast out."

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Tuesday, February 06, 2007

The Cost of Spanking, The Price of Discipline

In a recent article [here], it is brought to our attention that “Democratic assemblywoman Sally Lieber has introduced a bill that would outlaw this behavior [spanking] with children ages 4 and under”, which could lead to someone being “charged with a misdemeanor punishable by a year in jail or a fine of up to $1,000”. It also noted that “The use of physical punishment to discipline children is already illegal in Austria, Finland, Germany and Sweden.”

The preaching of Romans 1 against homosexuality is also illegal in countries around the world; don’t think it isn’t coming to America. How about a graph of how those countries have fared after a removal of physical punishment for discipline.

I realize that this is a most sensitive issue for sure; especially since most of us, surely at least the mothers, would like to believe that their child is an angel sent from God. Whereas they are “an inheritance of the Lord”, a joy, and a blessing, at times they do indeed show that they are full of depravity which moves their flesh to disobey authority and often times to outright rebellion.

I am not sure as to what they are considering “spanking” and “physical punishment”, but there is a proper way and improper way of biblical discipline. Most likely these cases have been based on the extreme occurrences, as seen on the news with video cameras in parking lots and the such, but there should be a consideration of difference between proper spanking and physical abuse.

I can recall the video of a lady in the parking lot “beating” her child and hearing those around say the woman is terrible and deserves this and that. I not am justifying the women on any accounts, but I believe we do have to consider when casting stones at her that we also look at ourselves to see how often we may have done a disservice to our children concerning discipline. We may not break out into a boxing match with them, but may holler and scream for them to get to their rooms because they are disrupting our favorite television program. But, at least we didn’t physically touch them, right?

Admittedly, discipline for a child 4 and under should be different for a 7 year old, as it should be for a teenager and then an adult; try spanking an adult. Still, discipline should be about more than just spanking. Usually “beating” occurs when we ourselves [parents] are just as out of control as the child we want to discipline is. “I’ll show them!”

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As a side note, I did have to laugh a little at the quote -“corporal punishment is of limited effectiveness and has potentially deleterious side effects.” – For the first thing that came to mind as corporal punishment is the death penalty. Now of course the death penalty is way above the idea of spanking, but I would consider the death penalty both completely effective with no side effects.
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The Bible is clear that if parents love their children they will spank them when they are disobedient [Proverbs 13:24]. The problem lies when the only verses in the Bible we know are “Children obey” [Ephesians 6:1; Colossians 3:20] and “the rod will drive out the foolishness” [Proverbs 22:15].

How is it that we forget the passages like Deuteronomy 6:6-8 and Deuteronomy 11:18-20 that tells us to teach our children the things of God at all times and everywhere we go? How is it that we forget to be the example and stop saying, “Do what I say”, “Because I am the parent”, or “Don’t ask me why”.

When they watch us and ask us questions, we are teaching them, whether we spend the proper time to explain and teach them, what is right or they see from us what is wrong.

How can we spank them for something today, scream at them for it tomorrow, then ignore it at a different time and expect children to know what is right and what is wrong? We are indeed teaching them to be as inconsistent and selfish as we are.

“Selfish? What do you mean selfish?” The reason that we do not love, teach, and discipline our children as the Bible says is because [1] we don’t keep in check our relationship with God, [2] we don’t take the time to properly teach our children, [3] we really don’t want to stop what it is we are doing to properly handle any given situation that arises.

Again, because we as Christians and as parents have failed to obey God, we find the government stepping in to “take control of the situation.”

Thank goodness God in His mercy doesn’t go around spanking and beating us into submission all of them time, but is also longsuffering and loving while teaching us what is right and what is wrong.

“Train up a child in the way he should go” involves more than just physically punishment, but proper spanking is biblical and necessary for child rearing; therefore, should not be outlawed by man’s government.

3 comments:

BEAST FCD said...

I don't believe in spanking children.

The use of violence to enforce rules is pretty much tyrannical: The child learns to obey by fear, not reason. Over the course of time, the child ceases to fear the spanking because he or she is so conditioned to it.

I have a fair share of friends who had parents who would not hesitate to weep them using the most heinous of tools: Belts, canes, etc thinking it is appropriate. Given that Asian families are more patriarchal by nature, they abide by stupid Confucius teachings which advocate such punishments. The result was that by the time they reached their teens they didn't really give a damn to what their parents say anymore. A couple of them end up dropping out of school.

Beast FCD

Writer, Splinters of Silver.com said...

It is highly doubtful that one could associate spanking with dropping out of school. Most often it is the 'do as I say, not as I do' attitude of parents which cause children to be led astray.

Tim

BEAST FCD said...

While spanking doesn't necessarily equate to dropping out of school, it is an ineffective form of punishment.

Like torture, spanking and other forms of corporal punishment can only go so far. Once kids develop a certain threshold of tolerance for pain they will be liable to go against the wishes of their parents.

The best way is to stick to non violence. I don't believe in caning or spanking kids, although many chinese folks do because of their stupid conservative backgrounds.

Beast FCD

John Bunyan

To be saved is to be preserved in the faith to the end. 'He that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved.' (Mt. 24:13) Not that perseverance is an accident in Christianity, or a thing performed by human industry; they that are saved 'are kept by the power of God, through faith unto salvation.' (1 Pet. 1: 3-6) But perseverance is absolutely necessary to the complete saving of the soul…. He that goeth to sea with a purpose to arrive at Spain, cannot arrive there if he be drowned by the way; wherefore perseverance is absolutely necessary to the saving of the soul.